It finally happened, it finally came.
Some were amazed, some were ashamed.
The world cried out, and screamed "Oh Lordy!
"Jason Falls is turning forty."
He's working out more, he's eating fine,
He's even drinking healthy red wine.
He'll buy a new car, bright red and sporty,
'Cause that's what you do when you turn forty.
His hair's turning gray, but it's not falling out
That would only make him whimper and pout.
It once was longer, but now it's short, he
Looks respectable at age forty.
A guy from the sticks, now he's all urban
With a house and a yard, and his fancy bourbon.
But he's still earthy, he's still bawdy,
It'll only get worse now that he's forty.
It's downhill from here, things can only get worse
You're one day closer to the ride in the hearse.
Spend the next thirty years turning wrinkled and warty
Because that's what happens when Jason turns forty.
Dedicated to my good friend, Jason Falls, my co-author on No Bullshit Social Media.