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Showing posts from September, 2012

How Not to Talk to Your Kids About Sex

Parenting experts (i.e. parents. Also, your younger sibling who has never had children) will tell you that, when it comes to explaining sex to your kids, there are two basic rules. First, ask clarifying questions, so you can understand what it is your child already knows, and what they're really asking. Second, always answer the question your kid asks.

For example, if your 6-year-old asks you where babies come from, this is not the time to explain the whole birds and bees thing to them. Instead, ask "do you mean, from the hospital?" or "where do you think they come from?" And they'll just want to know how they came home, so your answer "from the mommy's tummy" will be more than sufficient

Of course, it's going to be tougher when they come back a year or two later and ask, "how do they get inside the mommy's tummy?"

That's still not the time to explain the whole birds and bees thing to them.

Oh, I know, some forward-think…

Apple, pumpkin pie bakers sought; contest to include media celebrity judge

I'm going to be a judge in a pie contest at Switzerland County's Sleepy Hollow event. Normally, I wouldn't publish articles about me, but I liked this one. And it's from my friend, Kendal, and she asked her media friends to promote it through their outlets, so. . . .
Switzerland County Tourism invites budding bakers to enter apple and pumpkin pies into their annual fall pie contest. The competition coincides with the Sat., Oct. 6, 2012 Sleepy Hollow event in downtown Vevay, IN. Cooked pies should be hand-delivered to the Switzerland County Visitors Center, located at 128 West Main Street in Vevay, no later than 11:00am. Pies will be judged by a panel of judges beginning at noon.

Erik Deckers, an author, Laughing Stalk humor columnist, and blogger for the Indiana state tourism office, will be a media celebrity pie judge. Deckers quipped in a recent Indiana Insider post—the official blog of the Indiana Office of Tourism Development—that he wasn’t invited to judge the Sl…

A One-Sided Conversation With My Son About Music

"Hey Buddy, can you turn down your amp?"

"I SAID, CAN YOU TURN DOWN—oh. Uh, your amp."

"I know you're practicing."

"But you're practicing, not the opening act at Bankers Life Fieldhouse."

"Fine, Klipsch Music Center. But you don't need to crank up your amp so loud for practice."

"Of course I'd come see you play."

"Yes, even at Klipsch."

"Yes, in the summer too."

"Of course I like outdoor venues. Who told you I didn't?"

"Oh, she did, did she? Well, Mommy doesn't like the summer either."

"There's nothing wrong with sitting inside. It's nice and cool."

"That was not heat stroke! I just got a little overheated is all."

"That's because you kids need to be outside to build up a tolerance to the heat. It makes you appreciate the air conditioning when you're older."

"What were you playing, AC/DC?"

"Of course I …

Indiana Fever Fall to Minnesota Lynx, 66 - 64

It's one of our last two home games, as the Indiana Fever face off against the Minnesota Lynx in the first of two games in a row.

The game got off to another slow start, and we didn't see a point scored until Briann January scored after 2:07, but the Lynx had no such troubles. With 6:00 to go in the first quarter, it was Minnesota Lynx 10, January 2. By the time we reached 5:00, she had scored all 6.

At one point, the Fever had 11 points — January with 9, and Tammy Sutton-Brown (or as everyone calls her TammySuttonBrown) had the other 2.

Becky Hardy, the 3-point stair runner, was missing again today. Was that a factor?

The Fever finally got a spark lit under them, and they began to mount a comeback, thanks to two fast breaks by Katie Douglas, and it was 25 - 20, Lynx, after the first quarter. They also played some hard defense, holding the Lynx to four shot clock violations this game.

All told, the Fever did not look like they were playing at their best tonight. January had a…

Is Twitter Making Us Dumber? No More Than Usual

If you've been hearing about Twitter in the news this week, you probably think people are just getting dumber and dumber.

They are, but Twitter is not to blame.

One year after Anthony Weiner retired from the U.S. Congress after tweeting photos of his namesake to different women who were not his wife, two more celebrities are making the news because of Twitter.

Rapper Ervin McKinness, better known as "Inkyy" to his fans, died in a car accident just moments after tweeting "Drunk af going 120 drifting corners #F***It. YOLO."

His final tweet was one minute later, reading: "Driving tweeting sipping the cup f*** yolo I'm turning it up."

YOLO means "You Only Live Once," which McKinness did, after the driver — not McKinness — lost control of the car and hit a wall before flipping the car and landing in the back yard of a home. McKinness and three other passengers all died at the scene. A fifth passenger died later at the hospital.

While many people ha…

Indiana Fever Beat Phoenix Mercury, 89 - 83

It was an exciting night for the Indiana Fever on Sunday against the Phoenix Mercury, despite a slow, worrisome start from our team. There's a tradition at every game that you don't sit for the tipoff, and fans won't sit until the Fever scores their first basket. In this game, that first basket came after 2:03, when Tamika Catchings finally hit the first bucket of the night.

It didn't go well after that, because the Fever struggled to keep up with the Mercury for the first few minutes, and I worried that this was going to be a blowout, the likes of which we hadn't seen since the USA-Lichtenstein Olympic game.

(There was no USA-Lichtenstein Olympic game.)

I was also worried, because Becky, the woman who runs up and down the stairs after every 3-pointer, was not there either. She finally showed up during the second quarter, and the Fever seemed to find their groove around the same time.

Coincidence? Maybe.

Even though the Mercury are out of playoff contention — something …

Deep-Fried Candy Geniuses Raise Mars' Ire

My mom would never buy sugared cereal for us when we were kids.

"It's bad for you," she told us over and over.

"But it's an important part of a complete and balanced breakfast," I said. "That means it's healthy!"

Back then, a complete "balanced" cereal breakfast on TV included half a loaf of toast, a quart of orange juice, half a pound of fruit, six scrambled eggs, 12 pieces of bacon, enough hash browns to land a plane on, and a cereal bowl you could swim in.

If you want to understand why America is so fat, look at what we were told was healthy when we were kids. With that much food, eventually you will hit upon a combination of foods to equal a complete breakfast. Statistically, sugared cereal has a fair chance of being in the mix.

Lately, the cereal commercials have backed off some of their language and portion sizes. Bowls have gotten smaller, and there's plenty of fruit on the table. But smart parents aren't fooled and won…