Gone Fishin' - A One-Sided Conversation"Shhhh!!"
"Because you'll scare the fish away."
"I SAID, BECAUSE YOU'LL SCARE—crap."
"Because they can hear us, and they'll swim away."
"No, they won't actually stay away. Who told you that?"
"That's an old wives tale. He doesn't know what he's talking about. They'll only swim away temporarily."
"A few minutes. They'll be right back."
"Look, I'll show you. Do you see those fish right there?"
"The little ones."
"No, the little ones by the thing."
"No, the other thing. It's next to the. . . right by the. . . just. . . *sigh*"
"Buddy, look where my finger is pointing."
"Okay, do you see that big rock underwater? That's what I'm pointing at."
"Now look to the left of the rock."
"No, your other left."
"Yes, the little blue ones."
"Good. Now, what were we talking about?"
"Right, right. Old wives' tale."
"Watch what happens when I drop this little rock."
"It's not going to kill the fish."
"It's not even going to land on them."
"Fine, I'll drop it away from them."
"See? They swam away."
"Just be patient. Look, there they are."
"That's right, the same exact place."
"No, let's keep fishing."
"Because I'm all out of rocks."
"Because I didn't bring you out here to drop rocks at fish."
"To drown worms."
"I'm just kidding. Rubber worms don't drown."
"I don't like real worms."
"Because it's cruel to the worms."
"What did she say it really is?"
"I am not!"
"Oh yeah? Ask her if you can get a pet mouse. Then we'll see who's a big baby."
"I just don't like touching worms, that's all."
"I hate putting them on the hook."
"Because they're slimy and I hate it when they wriggle and thrash around. I can't stick them on the hook when they do that."
"I've never liked doing that. That's why I always fish with rubber worms."
"I know, but your sister is always playing with worms and bugs."
"This was Boys' Day today. We were just going to spend time together, you and me."
"Let them go."
"I didn't bring anything to keep the fish in, and I didn't feel like cleaning them."
"Because they're slimy too, and I hate it when they wriggle and thrash around."
"If you really want fish for dinner, we'll get some fish on the way home."
"We'll have the guy behind the counter throw them to us."
"So we can tell Mommy we caught the fish."
"I know, I'm sorry."
"When I was a kid."
"Yeah, I didn't think it was funny then either."
"You ready to go, Buddy?"
"Okay, one more rock. How far can you throw it?"
"Wait, wait! I think you got a nibble."
"Shhh… no-o-o-ot yet—NOW!"
"Carefully, not too fast."
"Just a little more. Almost there. . ."
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