Have you ever been in a situation where you're not supposed to laugh because you'll get into trouble? Of course, you have. We all have.
Like laughing in class when the teacher is yelling at you. Or laughing when your mom is yelling at you. Or laughing at work when your boss is yelling at you.
When I was about 10 years old, my mom yelled at me because she thought I had flipped a neighbor kid off. In truth, I hadn't; I only held up my pinky at him like it was my middle finger, and I told her so.
She shouted, "I don't care if you hold up your big toe at him!"
I wanted to laugh so badly, but I held it in. If I had, I would have gotten a smack, so I clamped down. My face looked like those Roman guards from Monty Python's Life of Brian.
I've always laughed easily, often, and inappropriately. There have been many occasions when I've been sitting in the back of a room, eyes watering, body shaking as I try to hold in a laugh that should never get out.
Like the time I was at a funeral, and a friend whispered, "Looks like I'm never getting that ten bucks he owes me."
I faked a coughing fit to cover up the explosive guffaw that burst out of me. People turned and looked at me, and I just covered my mouth and waved.
I don't know how England's Royal Guard does it. They're not allowed to smile or laugh while they're on duty because they're real soldiers whose job is to protect the royal family. But they have to deal with tourists who think it's their job to make the guards laugh or crack a smile.
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| This woman heard a hilarious joke. |
One time, I was walking into the Haunted Mansion ride with a couple friends and told one of the male workers, "You should smile more; you'd look really pretty." My friends cracked up, but to his credit, the guy never even blinked, although he may have blushed.
These people would have a tough time enjoying the Top Secret Comedy Club in London.
The owner of the club, Mark Rothman, has made a restriction to his club that's raising a few eyebrows. Other eyebrows, not so much.
He has taken the unusual step of banning patrons who have had Botox injections from the club. Botox users were outraged. At least, I think they were.
Top Secret, which lives on Drury Lane, next to the Muffin Man, said they have received "numerous complaints" from comics who said the motionless faces in the audience left them unable to perform.
I get it: It's probably the first time that's ever happened to them, but it happens to everyone eventually. It'll be better next time. It's even happened to me: There have been plenty of times people haven't laughed at my jokes onstage.
Rothman said in a news release that the performers "... find it increasingly challenging to gauge audience engagement and bounce off their reactions. Comedy thrives on connection, and facial expressions play a huge part. We want people to laugh, cry, frown, sneer, but frozen faces from Botox impact the entire atmosphere."
Never mind that with all the stage lights, you can't see past the first row.
Are you sure it was the Botox, though? It sounds to me like maybe the comics just weren't that funny. Are they experiencing similar problems in other comedy clubs? Or do they think every comedy fan in the UK is getting Botox injections?
Rothman has said audience members will be forced to undergo expression checks at the door to make sure they can actually move their faces.
"We hope trialing this ban will help move the needle and get facial reactions back into the room," he said, missing the opportunity to say, "RE-move the needle."
Top Secret has hosted some very funny comics in the past, including Dave Chappelle, Michael McIntyre, and Jack Whitehall. Also, Amy Schumer has performed there.
I can't tell if this is some kind of publicity stunt. Is this just a big joke to get people talking about the Top Secret Comedy Club? Calling it Top Secret was probably not the wisest move in the first place.
Rothman added, "We’re dead serious about the ban, and if you're surprised, we need to see that! We are looking forward to welcoming faces, old and new, that can still move, in our venue soon."
Looks like the Royal Guard need to find a new spot for their next work outing.
Photo credit: Andrea Piacquadio (Pexels, Creative Commons 0)
My new humor novel, Mackinac Island Nation, is finished and available from 4 Horsemen Publications. You can get the ebook and print versions here.