It’s often a surprise to some people that I have a day job that does not involve writing for newspapers. While I’m sure several of you think I get paid big bucks to make fart jokes on the Internet — I’ve made $5.87, lifetime — the fact is, I’ve been an entrepreneur for the last 16 years.
And with the impending tariff-induced financial crisis we’re barreling toward, there will be a lot more new entrepreneurs hitting the bricks as they get downsized out of their jobs.
So, I’m sharing seven important lessons I have learned about being an entrepreneur to help you start your own business.
1) You get to work your own hours, but no one said there would be so many of them. As an entrepreneur, I work from 7:00 to 9:00. That’s 7:00 a.m. to 9:00 p.m. That doesn’t include answering emails and filling out proposals before I go to bed. If you’re lucky, your weekends will be a lot easier and you’ll get to knock off in the mid-afternoon.
2) Work as a consultant. Depending on your last job, a consultant is about the only thing left open to you. Employers just aren’t hiring people in their 50s, even though age discrimination is totally against the law. But they are hiring consultants, and they’re paying more than they would have paid you for the same job. So, become a consultant and stick it to the people who refused to hire you in the first place.
3) Take your annual salary requirement and divide by 1,000. We work 2,000 hours per year — 2,080, actually, but the math is harder — so take your annual salary and divide by 2,000. That’s your current hourly rate. But you’re not going to work 2,000 hours per year (40 hours per week), you’re only going to work 1,000 (20 hours), so divide your salary needs by 1,000.
The rest of the time will be spent pursuing new clients, handling administrative tasks, playing solitaire, and weeping on your office floor, wondering why you ever had this stupid idea in the first place. (This last one will take up 75% of your time.) If your new hourly rate is under $75, then raise it to $100.
4) Make your previous employer your first client. Assuming you didn’t punch your boss in the nose on your way out, they’re going to need your skills because the manager was an idiot and fired their best people because the CEO wanted a new sports car. When they offer you your old hourly rate, tell them, "I’m a consultant now, and I know if you don’t submit those government forms, you’ll be fined $100,000. So this will cost you $50,000."
5) Go to networking events and meet new people. A lot of new entrepreneurs hate meeting people, which is why they liked working in an office or factory: They didn’t have to talk to anyone new or glad-hand a bunch of strangers.
Well, suck it up, buttercup. Do you like money? Does your family like eating? Then, get over yourself and start getting out there if you want to get paid for all the knowledge in that big, beautiful brain of yours.
Many people sneer, "It’s not what you know, it’s who you know."
Well, yeah, that’s the way the world works. You can either make it work for you, or you can whine about it over your cornflakes.
I know you think people skills just means dealing with Nancy, the office jerk, who takes joy in making your life hell, but that’s not enough. There are plenty of good people out there who don’t make you want to shake them. You just have to find them.
6) Get a good task management system. Personally, I use the overwhelming dread that I forgot something important that will tank my entire business. It’s free and easy to use, and has worked since the first day I started my business. It’s also how I remember my wedding anniversary.
Ultimately, owning my own business is preferable to working for someone else. I’ve had plenty of bosses who were complete idiots, and some who were worth their weight in gold. But no matter how good they were, all my hard work benefited them.
Now, I may work harder than ever, but it’s my company and I’m the one who benefits. A bad day of working for yourself is so much sweeter than a great day spent enriching someone else.
Which would you rather spend your day doing? Working from home in your pajamas, scrambling for new clients, being scared to death that this is the week it all crashes and burns? Or would you rather work at an office in a crappy chair, drinking bad coffee, and getting a steady, reliable paycheck?
Tell Nancy I said hi.
Photo credit: Erik Deckers (That's my office!)
My new humor novel, Mackinac Island Nation, is finished and available from 4 Horsemen Publications. You can get the ebook and print versions here.